Saturday, August 30, 2008


Believe it or not, the woman to my right in this picture is my sister! We share the same mother and shared the same roof albeit for a short while. Beginning this adventure of starting my own family with Corey has put some perspectives in place that I never gave second thought in the past. I have 3 brothers-Brad, Todd, Ralph-and my sister Angie whom are all significantly older than me. This age difference has always left me apathetic, thinking that it must not be that important for me to know them, since I didn't during my childhood. That has been eminantly reevaluated. I want Asher to know my family, and even more so I want to know my family. Friends can unfortunately be interchanged, but family is constant...or at least it should be. I want to be better at this, I want to remember birthdays and send holiday cards and call every once in awhile out of the blue. When major events happen in my life I want to think, "Man, I've got to call Angie!" or "Brad's gonna flip when he hears this." Right now I don't have those thoughts, the place where family is supposed to be is just sort of skipping like a dusty record, I keep repeating the same interspersed rare meetings that end up taking me to same place I was before. I'm tired of the 4 year reuinions, the catching up and missing out on nieces and nephews. Life is just SO busy, I know that if I want this, I have to make a priority for it. I guess I'm just not sure where to begin. What I do know, is that despite the distance and how little I know them, I LOVE my family. I love the dysfunction. I love the stories of hard faught success. I love that they will probably be the best characters for the book I may some day write, and that they are the best fruit I could hope for on my family tree.

Thursday, August 28, 2008


Asher knows just what to do when the camera turns his way. Here we are at JP's Java in Austin, TX. LOVE their coffee. Asher already has a little crush on his Auntie Krystal, who'd blame him! We had a great time on our recent trip to Austin for his Grannie's birthday...

We took a little trip down memory lane by visiting our old stompin' grounds around UT. It's funny how nostaglia creeps up on you right about the time you start noticing crow's feet and fine lines in your forehead. There are so many good memories there.


Certainly saying something profound.
Would you expect anything less?

Monday, August 18, 2008

metal head

We have tried to expose Asher to music in it's various forms.
Here he shows his preference for metal.


This morning I got up at 445am. I nursed Asher, put him back to bed, put on my running gear. It was dark and muggy and so silent. After my run, after Corey left for work, I sat outside to just feel the rain. It was magic for just those few minutes with the hum of cars nearby and the quiet drops dancing around. Sitting under an awning I let the insignificant deluge fall on my legs and shoes and just felt so wrapped up in the wonder of it. As the sun increased its height the sky all it's darkness was over taken, becoming azure and golden all at once. There is so much beauty when we taken just an extra moment to relax and look around, I don't want the memories of me to be etched in scenes of busyness and stress. I want people to remember that I loved, I laughed, I dreamed and hugged and took special moments just to fall in love with the pocket of nature all around despite the city. The most prominent memories of mommy in Asher's mind must not be of me fretting over dishes or laundry or Lord knows what else-I want him to remember that I lived life to the full and never looked back...

Friday, August 15, 2008


I love Asher's zest for experience, desire to taste life and shake what his momma gave him. He's starting to seem more and more like a little person, with individual desires and wants, preferences and dislikes. Currently he prefers Metal to Classical and dirty to clean. He prefers to laugh at Franklin as he feeds him his snacks as opposed to eating them himself. He also prefers to test his boundaries than obey when mom and dad say no. Who knew you could battle to maintain authority with a 9.5 month old? You also have to love that just now I had to break from writing this because he pulled the place mat off the dining table, tossing fruit snacks and crackers all over the floor, and then proceeded to try to stuff as many in his mouth while I cleaned them up. Sheesh, I have my hands full and I love every minute of it.

Thursday, August 7, 2008


I was sitting outside having some blanket time with the kiddos this morning and this thought hit me like a ton of bricks. People have entrusted their children's precious lives to me. Even if only for a few hours a few days a week, the privilege and responsibility is daunting. In a very small way I will have an influence on them, and I must fight to ensure that they walk away with a sense of respect for others and for authority, that my example is never one of complacency or laziness, but rather diligence and perseverance. Asher watches everything I do with these other little ones too, what will I say to him with my actions? My greatest wish is that every child under my care leaves feeling loved, with a sense of adventure in their heart, throwing off all inhibitions, dancing to every beat. We dance at my house a lot. Mostly to They Might Be Giants' "Here Come the 123s" or "Here come the ABCs." Occasionally to a little classic rock.

No one but me and then babies have witnessed this.
It will stay that way.

So...if you have a moment, pray for my care of these littles, that in my own small way I can instill in them the same great confidence my Father instills in me.

whoa big boy

He's just so big already!


That's right, I'm not too modest to say...I AM super-nanny. And I'll tell you why. This morning I took 3 boys, ages 9-11 months, to the park. Oh, but not with a car, with a double stroller and a baby backpack. Half a mile there, half a mile back, and when we returned home, I got them all to sleep at the same time. The good Lord was on my side today, and everyday for that matter. I just really appreciated the extra dose of peaceful baby 'tudes today.

Asher (9mo)-Will (9.5mo)-Liam(11mo)
Having some out door blanket time under a marvelous tree.
Sorry parents, there was some grass ingested.

Asher and me-snugglin' in the baby pack.

Friday, August 1, 2008

birds and bones

Here is a bit more from our Illinois adventures...

Here we are posing outside of Dixon Mounds, an Indian burial mound. A bit spooky.
Asher was all for posing with the ladies, but he wanted a shot by himself to prove he is tough stuff.

Here are Asher and I just outside Hummingbird Haven. A couple living between corn fields decided to turn their home into a Hummingbird oasis by outfitting it with a boo-coo of those feeder thingies. It was smokin' hot out.

Asher and his grannie trying to fight off the paparazzi.

A close-up of Ash's baby mohawk.

I'm looking forward to our next big adventure, it may not end up being until Corey start interviewing for residency in the fall, but we shall see. Please pray for future destination-that it be a great program for Corey, a great city for Asher and I, and that there be friends waiting to be made wherever we go. I'm not handling the fact of moving soon very well. In fact I'm avoiding feeling anything about it all together, which I know will spell disaster as the day approaches. I'm scared to leave my friends.

Speaking of friends...
You are well loved by me and my family!

inside out

(Asher and I in our jams)

There is this beautiful, mysterious aspect to the love you have as a mother. This tiny life turns your relatively peaceful world into a loud, stinky, utterly tumultuous war zone. Food, clothes and often bodily fluids fly about at will-your shirt is never clean. Yesterday I went to bed and realized that I had managed to wear my underwear inside out all day. It was 2pm before I had brushed my teeth though Asher had already had breakfast, a nap, play time and lunch. I, on the other hand, was wearing backward underwear and had only scarfed a cup of yogurt through dirty teeth-your life is no longer dedicated to your own as a mother-and it's glorious. Every little smile and giggle and tight tiny baby squeeze makes me realize that I just don't care if I'm not as glamorous or stylish or hip as I was 9 months ago-though I do really really want to be one of those "hot moms." What I really want is to care for my child and my husband and to foster a closeness between all of us and our Maker, a respect for others and for our world. I'm starting to realize that I don't have to be a picture perfect housekeeper or act as Corey's personal chef to do that. I need to be happy and in love with life, no matter the circumstance, and then I can give to the full.